Posted by Glynis Sherwood on Tuesday, May 24, 2011 In : Grief Recovery
Grieving Alone – A Recipe For Loneliness & Isolation
Do grievers withdraw by nature or due to shame and stigma for feeling upset? The idea that you should grieve alone almost always comes from social taboos against expressing painful emotions in public. Unless those in grief choose to grieve alone, this myth keeps others comfortable, while doing nothing for the griever except adding loneliness to the already painful experience of loss. Much like Myth #2 – Don’t Feel Bad, the belief... Continue reading...
Posted by Glynis Sherwood on Friday, May 13, 2011 In : Grief & Addiction Recovery
Remembering Gary
Last Friday I learned that my old friend Gary had died a few years ago. Prematurely gone. What's shocking is that he died so young. But what's more shocking is that I knew he was gone for many years. Not 'knew' in the facts sense, but intuitively, as I had sensed many years ago that his time had run out. It's a terrible feeling to know that about someone who is still walking around. Someone that you love. Alcohol ultimately killed Gary, or should I say he let it kill ... Continue reading...
Posted by Glynis Sherwood on Saturday, May 7, 2011 In : Grief Recovery
You Can Always Get Another Husband, Baby, Pet, Job...
This is perhaps one of the cruelest myths – that somehow you can ‘replace’ the beloved person or thing whose loss is breaking your heart. It’s a myth that tends to be entirely socially perpetrated, rather than originating from grievers themselves who know in their hearts that a deeply meaningful bond cannot be filled in by a substitute. This myth is related to myth #2 – ‘Don’t feel bad’. It tends to start in childhood... Continue reading...
Posted by Glynis Sherwood on Tuesday, May 3, 2011 In : Grief Recovery
You Can’t Step Into The Same River Twice - Heraclitus
Grieving people often look at me with worried expressions and ask, “When will I be my old self again”. This is particularly the case if their grief has been going on for more than a couple of months. Grievers sometimes believe that according to some unspoken, unquestioned or unconscious social guidelines, they should be quickly stepping back into the same place in their lives they were before their loss. Sometimes this expect... Continue reading...
Posted by Glynis Sherwood on Monday, April 25, 2011 In : Bereavement
By Ellen Gould-Ventura
I feel great pleasure and gratitude to be able to present this guest Blog post by musician Ellen Gould-Ventura. Ellen was unable to be with her mother, Hetty Ventura, at the time of her death in 2002. But Ellen brought her mother’s ashes home, and created a unique and beautiful ritual involving her young children to help process her grief and honor her mother’s roots in southern Spain. She has written a sensitive and moving chronicle of her grief recovery journe...
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Posted by Glynis Sherwood on Thursday, April 21, 2011 In : Bereavement
Posted by Glynis Sherwood on Thursday, April 14, 2011 In : Grief Recovery
Don't feel bad = Don't feel what you are feeling:
A Cautionary Tale
This article is the second in a series of posts that look at popular myths of grief recovery. Myth #1 looked at the erroneous but widespread notion that 'time heals all wounds'. Today's post examines the myth that you shouldn't or don't have to feel bad after a major loss. To a large extent the myths of grief recovery reflect a lack of knowledge about the process of grief and the needs of grieving people. But like many myth... Continue reading...
Posted by Glynis Sherwood on Monday, April 11, 2011 In : Grief Recovery
Time doesn't heal all wounds - it just passes. It's what you do with time that makes the difference in healing from grief!
I often hear from people in the early stages of grief - i.e. less than a year - who express fear that their grief is not resolving. They are concerned that weeks and months have gone by and they are still in pain, or possibly feeling worse, and are not over it like they 'should' be. On top of the pain of grief, many folks feel afraid that their grief is unhealthy, or ...
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Posted by Glynis Sherwood on Tuesday, April 5, 2011 In : Grief Recovery
Death and other forms of loss at best challenge and at worst violate our world view. To some extent we all get up each day assuming that the world is a relatively safe and predictable place - that our loved ones, our health and our work will continue to be there for us. Loss - especially sudden or catastrophic loss - confronts these beliefs, and we can feel profoundly upset and anxious having our 'assumptive world' disturbed. Human beings have a tendency to disbelieve or dismiss those eve... Continue reading...
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With a twenty year history of counselling and consulting experience, I help people recover from Chronic Grief and Loss, Trauma, Addictions, Stress, Anxiety, Depression, and Workplace Bullying. My counselling services focus on helping people heal from emotional distress and injury, and help restore and strengthen the psychological well being of individuals and their loved ones. I provide counselling and consulting at my office in central Vancouver, and WorldWide by telephone and internet. My belief is that no matter how harmful grief, anxiety, psychological injury or addictions have been in your life, you can recover and live a life of happiness, fufillment and purpose!
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