It's been almost seven years since a friend of mine called from India to tell me my friend Ab had died in his sleep on February 20, 2004. Seven years - blink. Time accelerates as you get older! It's strange how I knew the content of this message even before it was delivered, and braced myself to hear it. Is it tone of voice, the words "I have something I need to let you know", or perhaps an intuitive connection to the deceased that tips the utterer's hand? Or a combination of all of those things? Ultimately I do not know. What I remember about that moment is the brief disbelief, quickly followed by the knowledge that his death was final. Mostly I remember thinking "anyone but him". Not him. Not the one person who knew me when. Who shared my collective memories and history for decades. My friend who cared and continued to show he cared through time, geography and the good and bad fortunes of life and love. Now I have no one to share those certain memories with that are so meaningful to me, as only he was there. Mundane I suppose and common place, but precious memories nontheless of hiking and snowshoeing, and music and late into the night talks, and coming of age.
I realized over the years - although I had never really thought consciously about it before - that Ab was probably my best friend. By best friend I understood that even though we were not always in constant contact over the years, there was a timeless quality of ease and comfort between us when we met up, like we both knew it was a given that we would always care for each other. A friend of my youth, I came to trust him to consistently be in my corner. The world is smaller - too small - without him. His body is gone, but like mourners before me I have come to know that love endures very much in the present tense. That - like the constant quality of our friendship - I will continue to love him until the end of time. This is the gift of grief. And I thank him for that.
Glynis Sherwood MEd, CCC, is a Counselling Therapist specializing in recovery from loss, and complicated grief. For more information on how counselling can help you recover from Grief and Loss, contact me for a free 15 minute consultation. During that consultation we will discuss your situation, and how my counselling services can help you start to recover from grief and loss as soon as possible. You may contact me by telephone: 778-837-0616 or by email through my website: www.GlynisSherwood.com/grief-recovery-counselling.php My services are available in person in Vancouver Canada, or WorldWide by telephone or VOIP. I look forward to hearing from you and helping you on the road to recovery!
With a twenty year history of counselling and consulting experience, I help people recover from Chronic Grief and Loss, Trauma, Addictions, Stress, Anxiety, Depression, and Workplace Bullying. My counselling services focus on helping people heal from emotional distress and injury, and help restore and strengthen the psychological well being of individuals and their loved ones. I provide counselling and consulting at my office in central Vancouver, and WorldWide by telephone and internet. My belief is that no matter how harmful grief, anxiety, psychological injury or addictions have been in your life, you can recover and live a life of happiness, fufillment and purpose!
